Disclaimer: *sigh* Whatever, not mine. Never will be. No, I'm not pouting. *pout*
Spoilers: Anything that’s aired is fair game (although, in this case, we can safely go with only the pilot.)
Author’s notes: Kripke so didn’t look at a calendar when he wrote the pilot. *cringe* For the purposes of this fic, I’m going with his version of reality. Also, this is so note my usual style, but Jess seemed to prefer it this way.
Isn’t that weird?
Palo Alto, Saturday, November 1st, 2005
"Sam, my man, pick up the phone! Sam! Come on, man, we’re wait—"
"Jess? Hey girl! Tell that idiot you’re living with to get his ass in gear. He was supposed to be here forty minutes ago."
"He better be bringing coffee!"
"No, Luis, I mean, he’s gone! He left town with his—"
"You broke up?"
"What? No! Why would you even think you?"
"He left town with his brother. They were—"
"Sam has a brother?"
"Yeah. Dean. He just showed up here in the middle of the night and Sam took off with him."
"Huh. That’s weird."
"Don’t you think that’s weird?"
"I don’t know, Jess. All families are weird."
"But Sam isn’t. Sam’s the most reliable person I know—"
"Exactly. So you’re worrying over nothing."
"Yeah. Probably. I guess."
"Jess, what are you worried about? It’s not like Sam’s brother is some kind of serial killer. They went off for a couple of days to look for their dad. Sam’ll be back."
"Sorry, I must sound like a jealous girlfriend."
"Jess, Sam’s hardly going to leave you for his brother."
"Why did you say that?"
"That Sam was going to leave me. Luis asked if we broke up. Did Sam say something?"
"Jess, are you smoking crack?"
"It’s the only reason I can think of that you’d ask something so stupid. Sam is so crazy in love with you it’s sickening."
"You really think so?"
"Oh please, girl, quit fishing for compliments. Sam is over the moon for you and you know it."
"I’m sorry. It’s just this whole thing with his brother is really weird and Sam doesn’t do weird."
"Jess, relax. Sam will be back tomorrow, happy to be home and probably full of stories about what a jerk his brother is."
"You’re right. You are. I guess I’m just being paranoid."
"Am I being paranoid?"
"Yes, Jess, sweetie, you are."
"You did ask, dear."
"I know, but you’re supposed to humor me."
"Sorry, sweetheart, but this is where you call for the unvarnished truth."
"I knew I should have called Daddy."
"Only if you wanted him waiting for Sam with a shotgun when he got back."
"Mom! That’s not even funny."
"It’s a little bit funny. You know how your father is, sweetie. As much as he likes Sam, no boy is ever going to be good enough for his little girl."
"So, tell me about this mysterious brother."
"There’s not a lot to tell. I only saw him for a couple minutes before he drug Sam off God knows where."
"Was he cute?"
"Jess, I’m married, not dead. Considering how good looking Sam is, I figure good genes must run in that family."
"Yes, he’s good looking. In a totally hot, I can’t believe that’s my boyfriend’s brother, kind of way."
"Mom, you can’t ever tell Sam I said that."
"Don’t worry, sweetheart, my lips are sealed."
"Besides, I think he’s kind of a creep."
"I thought you only saw him for a couple of minutes."
"I did. But he totally ogled me. Mom? Mom, stop laughing!"
"I’m sorry, Jessie. Really, it’s just—Did he do this in front of Sam?"
"Then you have nothing to worry about. It was just a brother thing."
"He was just trying to get Sam’s goat. It’s only if he starts hitting on you when Sam’s not around that you have to worry."
"That makes no sense."
"I told you, it’s a brother thing. It doesn’t have to make sense."
"Jeremy never acts like that."
"Jeremy has two sisters, he’s never needed to act like that. But you should have seen the way your uncles used to behave over each other’s girls until they settled down."
"That’s just weird."
"That’s brothers, Jessie."
"It’s still weird."
"And you don’t think that’s weird?"
"Of course, I do, Becca. But I trust Sam."
"Of course you trust Sam, he’s Sam. But it’s still weird."
"I’m not arguing the point."
"I know, I’m just—I didn’t even know Sam had a brother. Did you?"
"Yeah, he mentioned him a couple of times."
"Really, what’d he say?"
"I have a brother. His name is Dean. You know what Sam’s usually like when it comes to his family. He never wants to talk about them."
"Yeah, I always thought that was kind of..."
"Weird. So, what did the brother look like?"
"Why does everyone want to know that?"
"Come on, Jess, you scored one of the hottest guys on campus. If he’s got a brother, I want to hear all about him. So spill. Does he look like Sam?"
"Actually, no. He doesn’t look anything like him."
"No. If Sam hadn’t of told me Dean was his brother I never would’ve guessed it. Except..."
"You know that picture Sam has of his parents?"
"Uh, yeah, I think so?"
"The brother totally looks like Sam’s mom."
"Is that a good thing?"
"So the brother’s cute?"
"Promise me you’ll never tell Sam."
"Tell Sam what?"
"Okay, okay, I promise."
"Alright. The brother? Smokin’ hot. If I wasn’t crazy in love with Sam—"
"But you are crazy in love with Sam, which means the brother fair game. So, when are they due back again?"
"Becca, we don’t even know anything about him."
"Yes, we do. He’s Sam’s brother and he’s smokin’ hot. What could possibly be wrong with him?"
"You’re incorrigible, you know that?"
"Hey! You know, not all of us are lucky enough to get a great guy like Sam."
"Yeah, I am pretty lucky, aren’t I? You know, I think I’m going to go. I want to call Sam and wish him good luck finding his dad. I’ll talk to you later, all right?"
"Call me Monday morning. We’ll go out for coffee before classes."
"Hey, it’s me, it’s about 10:20 Saturday night. I miss you. It’s too quiet around here without you. I hope everything’s going okay and you’ve found your dad. Call me if you get a chance, okay? Or even if you don’t. I just—I just really miss you, babe. So come home soon. I love you."
Sunday, November 2nd, 2005
"Jessica, honey, quit cleaning the linen closet and answer the phone."
"Mom? How did you—"
"Know you were cleaning the linen closet?"
"Honey, I hate to tell you, but that’s been your answer for stress since you were twelve years old. My linen closets haven’t been properly organized since you left for college."
"Are you still worried about Sam, sweetie?"
"A little. I haven’t heard from him since he left and…"
"Didn’t you say his father was hunting?"
"Yeah. Somewhere up around Jericho?"
"You know how spotty coverage is up North. Sam probably just can’t get a signal out where they are."
"Is that supposed to make me feel better? What if there’s an emergency?"
"No, Mom, I was thinking about it, and Sam’s dad is missing. What if something happened to him? You know, something bad. And Sam’s up there with this brother, that he never talks about, and—"
"I’m sorry. It’s just—I’m not used to Sam being gone and it’s too quiet and—"
"I’m sure Sam’s fine. You need to get out of that apartment and take your mind off of it."
"You know, Mom, you’re right, and I know just the thing to do that."
"That sounds more like my girl. Be sure to give me a call tomorrow and let me know how it works out."
"Caroline? Hi. God, it’s been ages. How are you?"
"Fine. I’m fine. What’s this I hear about Sam having a really hot brother…"
"…no, really, Michelle, I only met him for a minute and—"
"Becca says he’s totally hot—"
"I guess, but—"
"So, is he single?"
"Seriously, Kyla, he was only here for, maybe, five minutes. I barely met him."
"But he’s, like, drop-dead gorgeous and single, right?"
"I don’t know. I mean, yeah, he’s cute, but—"
"And he’s coming back with Sam? Tonight?"
"How many people did you tell about Sam’s brother?"
"Yes, Jess. Seriously, Becca, how many? And why are so many our friends so desperate? Stop, laughing, I’m serious. I’ve had at least fifteen phonecalls this morning asking me about Sam’s brother. I don’t think I even knew the last two girls. What did you say about him?"
"Nothing! I just told a couple people that you were at loose ends because Sam was out of town for the weekend with his brother."
"And that maybe the brother was a little good looking."
"A little good looking?"
"Bec, you haven’t even seen him."
"No, but you have and I trust your judgment on this."
"Gee, thanks so much. The least you could do is buy me lunch, since thanks to you I’ve had to talk to most of the single women in Palo Alto."
"I wish I could, but I’m at the airport."
"The airport? What are you doing at there?"
"Waiting for Zacky’s plane to come in."
"Zac’s plane? Has he been back in St. Louis again?"
"Visiting ‘she’s just a friend’ Emily? Again?"
"Yes! And get this, he’s spending Thanksgiving with ‘she’s just a friend’ Emily and her parents."
"Oooh, sounds like Zac is actually getting serious about a girl."
"I know! At the rate he’s going, I’m going to be trying on ugly dresses by graduation."
"You’re kidding! You think Zac’s that serious about her?"
"Don’t you dare tell anyone I told you. Not even Sam. But, yeah, I think Zac’s really in love with this one."
"Oh my God, Bec, that’s great."
"I know! Who would’ve thought my big brother could actually settle down with one girl. The only thing that would make it better is if it was you and Sam."
"Oh, shut up, you know the two of you are totally going to get married some day. You’ll probably have 2.5 perfect kids and live in a big mansion in the city and—"
"How about if we just finish college first?"
"Whatever. Deny it all you want, you know it’s true. So, entertain me while I’m stuck here at the airport. What are you doing with your freedom today?"
"Well, I was going to have lunch with my best friend, but since she’s so callously tossed me aside to cruise for men at the airport—"
"I thought I’d do a little shopping, pick-up something to make Sam’s homecoming a little memorable."
"Really? Do tell."
"You’re worse than Luis, you know that, right? I meant some of those chocolate chip cookies he loves at Goody Twochews."
"Whatever. It’s my turn, I’ve got to go."
"Uh huh. Call me tomorrow and let me know how Sam liked his cookies."
"Hi, Mom. I know it’s date night and you’re out with Daddy, but I just wanted to call and say thanks. Sam should be home in a couple hours and I know I’ve been a little weird this weekend, so thanks for listening. Love you. Talk to you tomorrow."
* * *
Author’s Note 2: I love Eric, really, but the man obviously did not look at a calendar when he was writing the pilot. November 3rd, 2005 does not fall on a Monday. It was a Thursday. But, hey, in J. K. Rowling’s world September 1st is always a Monday. So I can go with it. Except, it if November 3rd is a Monday and Jess dies on November 2nd (Sunday) and Sam leaves with Dean after Halloween (which would have to have been Friday) there just isn’t anyway that Jess was calling Sam at 10:20 on Friday. I’m sorry. I’ve listened to the message she left Sam and I know it sounds like she’s saying Friday, but the only way the math works at all is if it’s Saturday. Which is my long way around saying I took liberties with Jess’ message on Sam’s cell phone.